In the business world, and life in general, one of the most undervalued assets we possess is our energy. I don’t just mean time or money. I mean your focus, your goodwill, your ideas, your spirit, and the genuine intent you bring into your relationships.
As entrepreneurs, we often lead with generosity. We’re wired to build, to help, to create something from nothing, and part of that involves forging connections, mentoring others, giving advice, opening doors, and investing in people. Sometimes those people are collaborators, future partners, or simply individuals who admire your journey.
At first, everything feels reciprocal. You’re building a relationship, maybe even a business. You share contacts, make suggestions, offer insights, and support their growth and in rare cases even start a business with someone. It feels like a mutual win. But over time, you may notice something: you’re always the one giving. Always the one checking in. Always the one extending the hand.
And then it hits you, some people are not in your life to build with you. They’re in your life to take.
“Sound familiar? – I bet it does…”
Some do it subtly. Others more blatantly. But the result is the same: they drain your energy, dilute your focus, and take advantage of your good nature and experience. In the worst cases, they’ll even undermine your trust, stab you in the back, spin stories, or try to use what you’ve built for their own gain, without credit, without loyalty, and without a second thought.
This isn’t bitterness, it’s reality. It happens. And if you’ve been in business long enough, it’s likely happened to you too.
Here’s the truth I’ve come to live by:
You cannot build something meaningful and sustainable if you constantly surround yourself with people who take more than they give.
As much as we might like to see the good in everyone, and yes, we should stay kind, we also need to protect ourselves. Because energy, just like capital, is a limited resource. And if you allow the wrong people access to it for too long, you’ll find yourself drained, distracted, and disappointed.
So what can we do about it?
1. Give Generously – but Consciously
It’s a beautiful trait to be open, kind, and giving. But pair that generosity with awareness. Not everyone deserves front-row seats in your life or business. Share, but don’t give away your blueprint to people who haven’t earned your trust.
2. Protect Your Circle
Not everyone is meant to walk the full journey with you. Some are seasonal. Some are transactional. And that’s fine. But the ones closest to you, the ones with real access to your thoughts, plans, and energy, should be carefully chosen. Are they building with you? Are they giving back? Do they speak well of you when you’re not in the room?
3. Recognise Energy Drains
We all know them. The conversations that leave you tired. The people who only reach out when they need something. The ones who can’t celebrate your wins without making it about themselves. Pay attention to how people make you feel, because that feeling is data.
4. Don’t Be Afraid to Walk Away
Walking away doesn’t have to be dramatic. Sometimes it’s just creating space. Becoming less available. Shifting your energy elsewhere. When people show you they’re only in it for themselves, believe them, and adjust accordingly.
5. Build With the Right People
This is the game-changer. Find the ones who match your energy, your integrity, and your ambition. People who show up, contribute, and celebrate the vision. These are the ones who help you grow something real, together.
I’ve learned this the hard way, more than once over the years. But each time, the lesson has made me more focused, more grounded, and more selective. I still give, I still help, but I’m no longer blind to patterns, sometimes I am foolish and give them some time to fester but that is a weakness of mine, hopefully not yours.
We can’t stop people from being who they are, but we can stop giving them our energy, trust, or access once we see the truth.
Protect your energy like you protect your business, because in the end, it’s all connected.
I hope this piece of solid advice resonates with you, whether you’re just starting out or already deep in the journey of building your business. The truth is, every entrepreneur, at some point, will encounter these kinds of one-sided relationships. It’s part of the territory. But how you respond, and how you protect your energy going forward, can make all the difference. If this helps even one person make a smarter decision about who they let into their circle, then it’s worth sharing.
